Media personality Bolanle Olukanni has said that she will not join in saying that “men are scum” and she gave her reason for this.
She tweeted: “At some point you really have to choose to stop hating men. And if you are going to continue to hate them then free yourself from expecting anything from them so the disappointment is doesn’t sting as much.”
Some told her that calling men out for the wrong they’ve done is not “hating” rather it’s holding them “accountable”.
Bolanle then explained in a follow-up tweet why she will not join in calling men out.
She wrote: “I don’t use my mouth to spoil my future. I don’t think all men cheat. I don’t think men are scum. I don’t believe that I will prepare for a cheating partner. I do not say these things or entertain these thoughts . So that energy please pass me with it . “
She added: “How the hell are you getting married and preparing for a cheating scenario. The madness. Please please . If you are then just don’t marry. Enjoy your life as a single person. Be merry.”
Since her tweet came on the heels of tweets shared by a number of women calling out men for sexual abuse, some Twitter users accused her of excusing bad behavior.
One Twitter user wrote: “Honestly bolanle you’re my girl and I love you but this is such poor timing for this kind of thread.. women can’t be re-living their rape and sexual assault stories and you choose that period as the time for ‘men are flawed like everyone else’. Yes there are amazing men out there.”
But Bolanle replied: “None of my tweets have nothing to do with the discourse on rape that is going . We are discussing people’s expectations in marriage and THAT is the conversation I am having on my timeline. Do NOT put words into my mouth.”
She insisted that she’s not excusing anyone’s behaviour but she’s choosing not to be negative.
She wrote: “Human beings are flawed. Period. Men and women. Men showcased their flawed nature by oppression and manipulation and alll the horrible things they have done in the past and continue to do. But they aren’t scum. They are human and flawed.”
She added: “There is nothing you can tell me that will make me change my perspective. Not all men cheat. If you choose to believe that -prepare for your cheating partner. I will not. If you understood the power of your mind you wouldn’t say this. Our minds are supernatural. That’s on that.
“Please leave me out of your negative nancy party abeg. Life is hard enough. I choose to control my thoughts and work hard to ensure my perspective on life will bring good energy.”